"Be Somewhere Else!"

So there I was. drinking my favourite green tea in the joint which has become my go-to for sitting down. The day is beautiful out, and the conversation is flowing.

Then I hear these women beside me, chatting about something. One is blonde, one brunette. The blonde says something about the difficulties in getting a man. Her friend points to me, saying "What about that man?"

The blonde looks at me and says this.

"I'd rather stick my hand in a blender."

At this point, I'm looking the blonde and brunette squarely in the eye. They just caught my undivided attention. I just say three short words to them, slowly and quietly.

"Be somewhere else."

The brunette has a look of absolute horror on her face. She pushes the blonde out of the café and not a single further word exchanged.

Some days, I get dreams like this. I'm just someone trying to get their shit together, you know?